No, Sara, No!

I know you want to

do well in the debate

against Joe Biden

 

Sara, but you've got

 

to leave your dress on. 

PS/I just can't help myself!

It ain't just Sara...

"Back during the 1929 depression when Roosevelt was President - he stood up on television."  VP candidate, Senator and Chairman of the Foreign Relations Committee, Joe Biden. 

Palin on education and the world...

after being "coached" by Elizabeth Hasselbeck: "I personally believe - - that - - US Americans are unable to do so - - because uh, some people out there -- in our nation -- don't have maps -- and I believe that our education -- like -- such as South Africa -- and, uh -- the Iraq -- everywhere like such as and -- I believe that they should --  0ur education over here! -- in the US -- should help the US -- should help South Africa --and should help the Iraq -- and the Asian countries -- so we will be able to build up -- our future -- for our children." The photo by http://nachofoto.com/photo-of-Sarah-Palin-fake-pho-4b87bee35c06 The text from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WALIARHHLII&feature=related

PS/Message to the Republican National Committee and Senator "Maverick" McCain. Let Gov. Palin be herself. She does not need your "handlers." She blew the interviews with Gibson, Hannity and Couric because you're trying to make her an extension of the Republican "Borg." Even your own folks agree its not working. Let her alone. 

I'm just going to enjoy...

the Lockridge "penis" post a little while longer. I've received such positive responses from it. Lockridge still refuses to acknowledge this blog and others. He knows we're so much better than the rest of the trucking "mainstream" media. In the meantime, I invite you to please support the other trucking blogs out there on the net. The sites I'm aware of are listed in the "Links" section in the right column lower down here.Start first by going to  http://lifeontheroad.com/   ENJOY!  and - have a great week. 

** The photo credit is: http://www.manicmalta.com/20050530_LOL_Productions.htm

Lockridge wants YOUR penis to be larger...

Yes, you read that right. Evan Lockridge, trucking broadcaster extraordinaire, can be heard on Sirius 147, Road Dog Trucking from 2-4pm daily. I try so hard not to listen, but he's additive in a SNL - Saturday Night Live kinda way. 

The callers are mostly redneck morons who use their CB "handles" and his guests, are, how can I put it, clueless and boring. The show is part informational, part infomercial and part stand-up. 

Lockridge himself, a "4-wheeler" is entertaining, but still doesn't know much about "real-world" trucking. You're wrong Evan - you can type on a Qualcom, even while you're driving. A hour of an Allied Van Lines driver survey? Or was that another informercial. Like anyone cares. 

Callers into the show are always saying "Oh thank you, Evan", "You're the best", "If it wasn't for you, Evan!." It's sooo damn corny. I always wondered what the deal was. After briefly checking on the "show" the last few days, I figured it out. Lockridge wants all his male listeners - mostly horny truckers who have not have "real" in a long long time - to have a larger penis.

Apparently, all those callers have listened to him, now have larger and longer - I mean "bigger"-  penises, and are calling in to thank him. How do I know? Well, Prolixus is a regular advertiser on his show. Prolixus? The MALE ENHANCEMENT FOLKS! "A tissue stimulating formula! Stretch those "walls" with your (new) thick and wide penis." That's what they say on their web site. "Be thick, be wide - always satisfied." The sexy woman voice (Kelly Lynn Daniels) says (I'm paraphrasing) - "Does size matter? Not the length, it's the width - the thickness. All the ladies out there are now smiling just thinking about it!" Oh yeah, baby!!

Heck, if you listen to Lockridge's show, you can order this "magic" and "creepy" stuff and get a FREE MEASURING DEVICE" to "monitor" your success. I kid you not. And you can even use this "device" to make "better"(thicker and wider?) entries in your log book! What a deal? A bigger - thicker penis and a great looking log book! No wonder Lockridge's callers are thanking him so much! 

Lockridge recently has been a lot happier and in great spirits. He's even laughing more and making fun of his many stupid mistakes. He has even started calling female truck drivers - sweeetie. Can you say Prolixus? Thanks, Evan, but I like my penis just the way it is. And $76.99 for a bottle of 60 "magic" pills is way too rich for my blood. 

1. The credit for the photo is: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michelangelo's_David

2. Lockridge really wants you to be happy, larger and thicker so you too can call into his show and thank him, so please go to: http://www.prolixus.net/

** Hey, Evan, don't you think David up there could be thicker and wider? Does Prolixus come in a creme? LOL

Working...

Wow, what a concept. I've been sitting around so much I'm getting sores on my behind. The new seat "they" gave me isn't as comfortable as I thought. 

Anyway, I delivered to the Atlanta airport on Wednesday morning. I got to the airport at 7:45am, cleared two security checkpoints, then sat in the "bone yard" until they found an available lift and spotter. It was 3pm. Did you get that? There at 7:45 am and unloaded at 3pm. That's  7 freek'n UNPAID hours! Did you say detention? Oh, please my stomach hurts I'm laughing so hard. 

The only good part of this was watching the jets takeoff on two parallel runways. I was parked right in between, and could see the faces of the crews and passengers as they lifted off the ground.  I really wanted to be on one of those jets, especially the huge Korean Air one that seemed to struggle to go up. I wondered where it was going. I was getting depressed. At 4pm I boogy'd outta there to the "J" at exit 201 Jackson, GA off I75. Another wasted day.

Next morning. Get a call from my DM (driver manager) who asked me if I would dead head to Greenville, SC to repower a load going somewhere in CT. Hey, what am I gonna do - refuse? I hate CT, but the $350 weekly paychecks are kill'n me. Sure, no problem, I said.  I pulled out of the "J" heading north on I75 to get the load from a driver who was "stuck" at a local KW dealership. Seems he is having "electrical" problems. Hum, a KW with electrical problems - where have I heard that before? About 25 miles away, she (my DM) said the "deal" was cancelled. Back to "J" I went.  

About a hour later, another call. Could I head to Columbia, SC to repower a JIT "hot" load from another driver who was stuck at a local KW dealer. Hot and JIT, wow, what a combo. You'd think I get some kinda of bonus - ARE YOU KIDDING! Can you say no way Jose? 

Seems this other driver is also having "electrical" problems. Hey, what am I gonna do - refuse? I hate Md, but the $350 weekly paychecks are kill'n me. Sure, no problem I said. Heard that before? I pulled out of the "J" and went to Columbia, stopping for fuel at some lousy Pilot somewhere. 

That night and about 672 miles later. I had called my final to ask if I could park there overnight. No answer. So I parked at some really dark Virginia rest area. Amazingly there was a space. It was about 10pm. I didn't fall asleep until about 1am. I'm reading John Gresham's new book about football in Italy. And then there's my tush, which is sore as hell. 

6:45. My cell goes off. I don't remember setting it's alarm. My DM is asking if I can deliver by 9 am. The customer is calling. Where is their hot JIT "mud" - roofing goo. I'm about 105 miles away, I think. My GPS died (another story) so I break out my sextant since the sun wasn't up yet. Just kidding 'bout the sextant thing. I had to think. Where the hell am I. Tulsa, Jackson, Macon, oh yeah...no that's not it, damn, I think again, oh shit, south of DC. No, 9am is no good, how about 10? Great, thanks. 

What the hell did I just do. 10am. I'm wasted. 10 hour break? Ha! The coffee has gone though. I guzzle it down. A quick walk around. Tightened everything up. I'm rolling. Red light on the PrePass before the VA scale. Did I expect anything else? The first VA scale yesterday gave me a PrePass green. I guess I became overweight overnight even after burning off more diesel. Morons! Whatever. I pull on the scale. I'm 79,200 -37,600 on the trailer, but that's with a spread axle. What seems like 10 minutes later I get the green. I'm the DOT dunce inside had to think it about it a second. What a waste of time.

The sign says no delay on the approach to the Wilson. That's the new bridge over the Potomac from VA to MD. A freak'n pain the ass at rush hour. After or before, I forget, 4 lanes become 3 and then become 2. Hell people let's rock'n roll, I'm on a hot load here. It's 9:30am and ma and paw pinheads are coming out of their retirement homes to creep along the interstate headed where ever q-tips go. The early bird dinner at I-Hop? It's too early. Whatever, get out of my way! 

10:05. I'm still 29 miles away. I call them. A load of what. You know, the hot JIT load of roofing goo. Ok, whatever, they say. We'll take you until 4, otherwise it'll be Monday. But, but, I have your hot JIT goo -- is this the same place that called asking where I was at 6 am this morning? Must have been someone else needing their hot JIT goo. 

10:35. I find the place without any signs. They must be in "cloaked" mode so the INS can't find them or something. If they answered their damn phone yesterday afternoon, I could'a been sitting here and unloaded earlier. 11:30 I'm unloaded. All quiet on the western front. If there's no freight I'll been stuck here all weekend, again, just like the last three weekends. Maybe some other driver will breakdown, get stuck at the KW dealer, and I go the rescue, again.

Anybody have a invitation to the White House or some Embassy dinner this weekend? I'm available and only a short drive from downtown DC. So, it's all hurry up and sit. Driver, you know the deal. Right?

The photo credit is http://www.martin-wagner.org/Boeing_747-Korean_Air_Cargo_Frankfurt_am28102005-600.jpg

America, Inc.

Hi there citizens! Do you remember me? I'm your Uncle Sam. And the little lady next to me is my, friend, I mean niece. "Tell 'em my name, Sammy baby." Oh yeah citizens, this is Suzie, my niece. Oh, I told you that already. Oh well. Hey listen citizens, I'm here to give you some great news about "your" government. That's your government, the one that takes sooo much out of your paycheck each week. Well, we're growing to serve you better. We're spending billions of "your" dollars without asking you. We're proud to announce that AIG, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac have been nationalized and are now part of your government. And to reflect these changes we have changed the name of your country from The United States of America to America, Inc. You like it? Sure you do. We've now spent $800 billion dollars of "your" taxpayer money on "bailouts." Awesome. Your government is now in the business of insurance, weapons, mortgages, law and order, farming, oil and gas, truck driver health, hurricane and tornado rescue and sooo much more! Your government might be also be in the airline and auto manufacturing business by this time next year. If Chrysler goes under, we'll be right there with a really large net of your hard earned cash. We thinking of renaming the Chrysler 300, the America! Nascar is looking better and better. Maybe we'll buy them too. In fact, should the economy continue into the toilet, we might just nationalize everything, like Venezuela did. In fact, our new economic model is China. Can you say comrade? Oh, this is all so exciting. Well, citizens, I mean comrades, that's all for now. I'm your Uncle Sam and that's my friend, I mean niece, Suuzee. 

The credit for the photo is http://www.flickr.com/photos/25057732@N06/2478238363

Experience isn't what it seems...

and it has nothing to do with this election. It has everything to do with the person. I've dealt with "experience" all my working life. One place I worked, a young guy with no "executive" experience was promoted to VP because he was the same religion as the President. At a big bank I worked at some man who never made a loan was promoted to President. He recently retired from that bank a millionaire. A friend of mine at the same bank was rapidly promoted to VP at a six-figure salary because he went to an Ivy League university. I've had to live with nepotism everywhere I've worked. Sons, daughters and spouses getting the highest paying jobs with little or no experience. Two women I knew slept their way to the "middle." They never made it to the top. Bush, the son, was the former Governor of Texas. He also managed a baseball team. How did all that "experience" help him? It didn't. I'm sure someone was paid to get him through Harvard. Lyndon Johnson had loads of experience. He got us deeper into Vietnam. Reagan was a former "B" movie actor and Governor. Arnold, now Governor, was an action hero in the movies. Carter was a former Naval submariner and Governor. Ford was a Congressman. Kennedy, a war hero (PT 109) like McCain, was also a Senator. Obama was a community organizer. Palin is Governor of Alaska. I've know people who got jobs because they were Black, female, Asian, Jewish, Italian, Greek and thinner - all with, I guess, some experience. And what did it matter? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Because despite having no experience or all the experience in the world, what matters is the person. And a "good" oerson always knows where to look for the best possible answers. That might be better than experience. Experience is not always the best thing. It can hurt us more than help us. We should all stop talking so much about experience. Remember, it's not about experience, it's about the person.  

The credit for the photo is  http://www.flickr.com/photos/chavals/2225253202/

Hang on, we're not there yet!

Trust me, I minored in economics in college. Stop worrying. This will all be over soon. You'll be able to let go and get off. But right now, you're an unwilling passenger on the rich folks "game" train. And boy oh boy are "they" taking "us" for a ride. 

Hooooo, hoooo goes the whistle. Dollars, dollars, dollars, dollars, hoooooo, hooooo - we hate the middle class - we hate the middle class - hooooo, hoooo. Screw the middle class, hooooooo, hoooo, they'll always be poor, hooooo, hoooo, they're all losers, hooo, hoooo. Did they think they could get ahead - ha! Hooooo, hooooo.

Did you listen to Lou Dobbs tonight? The "panel" of rich white old men said its "all" Clinton's fault. Seems he was trying to let more middle class and poor folks buy homes. How dare he. It had nothing to do with 8 years of Bush and a Democratic do-nothing Congress. It has nothing to do with greedy old men paying each other millions to steal from the middle class and give more to the other rich old men. The ex-CEO of Freddie Mac was paid $33 million dollars over 4 years!

McCain, who owns 8 homes - isn't that what Cindy said they have? - tells us the "foundation" is sound. Ok, but we're working with a "foundation" where the price of oil has decreased 33% the last few months, but the price of gas at the pump has gone down only 7%. This "foundation" tells us that the economy has grown 3.4% in the 3rd quarter, but thousands of folks are losing their jobs, you cannot afford a new car and the price of your home has been cut in half. The government is now talking about "bailing out" AIG with a $85 billion dollar "loan', but personal bankcrupcies have skyrocketed, and when is the last time you got a decent raise, if you still have a job. 

This is all a rich persons game. Your less than a pawn in the game. There is nothing you can do about any of it. So sit back and relax. When the rich folks get tired doing whatever it is that they're doing - the people and party they have already chosen will get elected. They'll let us vote just to appease us poor folks.  This time next year, when the dust has settled, you'll be just fine and you'll be able to let go and get off. You might even forget that it even happened, just like when Clinton was elected President. Remember? I didn't so. 

The credit for the photo is http://www.flickr.com/photos/michaelharris/1570088790/ 

A "Blue Ribbon" Commission?

Do you really want your next President to appoint a "Blue Ribbon Commission" to investigate what is happening to the mortgage and credit industry? Do you remember the Warren Commission? What about the 9/ll Commission? McCain is an experienced and distinguished politician. Is the best he can up with is to appoint a commission? Is that supposed to make "us" feel better? I don't think so. He would have to appoint some old white guy, a close "friend" of his who typically is a former Governor or Senator or some billionaire business person, to head it up. Then that person would have to chose bi-partisan members (more old folks with old ideas) to work for the commission. Then there would be a large staff, of let's say 250 Ivy League lawyers and interns. Then they'll need a big budget to pay for all the laptops, papers, copying machines, and of course, travel. We're looking at a year or more of investigations and hearings. Then we would have to wait for the 5000 page report. Then everyone under the sun would have to talk about what was written in the report. Then the Congress would try to act on the recommendations. Let's throw in an independent prosecutor, just for fun. More hearings and lots of partisan policies. Bottom line, nothing would get done. If elected, we would already be into McCain's second term, or Palin's first. This is not change. A great deal of our money would be wasted. This is totally a Bush move. And this is absolutely not what I want the next President to do. The pig, sans lipstick, in a blue ribbon is by  http://www.flickr.com/photos/pickingdaisy/2082172199/

SPECIAL REPORT - DOW DROPS 500 POINTS

Recently, I wrote a post about the need for more Federal regulation of the trucking industry. Obviously it's not just trucking that needs more regulation - the housing and credit industry is badly in need of it as well.

Republicans and Democrats have turned the other way long enough. All the talk of a free market economy with less government regulation has resulted in government bailouts, bankruptcy, crash mergers and the deepening of the recession that began a year ago. 

What we have here is the Bush administration, along with Congress controlled by Democrats, that have enabled this mess to occur. Enabled is the key word here. This could have been prevented by the Fed tightening up policy and the much overburdened SEC keeping a closer on eye on unsecured lending practices. Some of these problems actually go back to the Clinton administration, when regulations were eased. Imagine a hot air balloon of unsecured debt and bad housing loans. Up and up it went.  Now, suddenly, the air is coming out, faster and faster. And the balloon falls back down to earth. Well, today it landed with a big thud. 

The resulting auditing autopsies will give us the details of why this happened. Right now, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are part of the government, Bank of America just bought Merrill Lynch and Lehman Bros. has declared bankruptcy. With just these "deals" alone, potentially 50,000 people could lose their jobs. Lehman's debt is 50 times greater than Enron, which went under 6 years ago. For the middle class, car loans, home and home equity loans will be much harder to get as credit requirements will get tighter and tighter. 

The Dow went down 500 points today. Look for your 401K, which you have watched shrink, to lose more value. Today about $700 billion "disappeared" from government pension funds, retirement plans a variety of other investment portfolios. A.I.G (American International Group) is in trouble. And McCain and OBama have no presented any rescue plan, despite a large entourage of economic advisers and experts. Overseas, the markets in Asia, the Middle East, Russia and Europe have all be negatively impacted by the tumult here in the US. And, it all will definitely get worse before it gets better. 

The credit for the photo is http://www.davidhorvitz.com/if/hot_air_balloon.jpg

HR 5244

is important legislation apparently stalled in the House. It is the Credit Cardholders Bill of Rights. The bill was "introduced" by Representatives Carolyn Maloney (D-NY) and Barney Frank (D-MA). Frank is also the Chairman of the House Financial Services Committee. In order for the bill to become law, the full House and Senate must pass it. Nancy Pilosi (D-CA) the House Speaker has to allow a vote on this bill before the election. 

Do you recall the new bankruptcy rules that were voted into law a few years ago? Well, that was very much in favor of the financial services (credit card) industry. It did little to help out middle class struggling Americans. According to The New York Times, "That law has made it far harder and costlier for people to declare bankruptcy. It also forces struggling consumers into what is called a 'sweat box of credit card debt.' Consumers in financial trouble are forced to pay larger fees and interest rates over a longer period of time before they can finally declare bankruptcy." 

McCain (R-AZ) and Biden (D-DE) both voted in favor of that bill. Sen. Obama voted against it. McCain has not taken a position on HR 5244, and, I don't know if Gov. Palin's "handlers" have "educated" her regarding the merits of this legislation.  

Let's get this bill onto the floor for a vote, Speaker Pilosi. Apparently you're spending too much time listening to the banks and credit card company lobbyists. What are you waiting for? I would also ask why OOIDA is not promoting this legislation? Is it not "landmark" enough for them?

From Congresswoman Maloney's website - "This bill is designed to protect cardholders against arbitrary interest rate increases, protect cardholders from due date gimmicks, shields cardholders from misleading terms, empowers cardholders to set limits on their credit, protects vulnerable consumers from fee-heavy sub prime cards and requires Congress to provide better oversight of the credit card industry."

Learn more at http://www.my3cents.com  

Details of the bill can be found at http://thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query

Tina Fey was brilliant as...

Gov. Sara Palin of Alaska on SNL, Saturday Night Live, on NBC last night. http://www.nbc.com/ to see the clip. Sen. Hillary Clinton is played by Amy Poehler. The photo of Fey (not Palin) is by Evan Agostini of the Associated Press. *** reminder, the full transcript/video of the Charles Gibson/Sara Palin ABC interview can be found here:

http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/Vote2008/story?id=5795641&page=1

Where is the integrity?

I am transcribing the following "letter to the editor" word for word from today's Sunday 9/14/08 The New York Times. It was written by Ms. Anne Krick of Wheaton, Ill in response to Paul Krugman's 9/12 column titled "Blizzard of Lies."

"When is anyone with a conscience from the McCain campaign going to stand up against this "win at any cost" campaign? Where is the outrage from honest Republican commentators? I'm afraid that it will all come back after the fact, and someone will write a book bemoaning the fact that negative campaigning works. And one of the staffers who is coaching Sara Palin now will tell us, when it is too late, that she really was unqualified, but they were afraid of losing their jobs. Where is the integrity of anyone on the McCain campaign?" 

Had enough of Shawn Hannity? Come over from the "dark side" and read Paul Krugman, Thomas L. Friedman and one of my hero's Maureen Dowd at http://www.nytimes.com/ . The photo is of Mr. Krugman from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Krugman

*** The full transcipt and video of the Charles Gibson/Sara Palin ABC interview is now available on line at http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/Vote2008/story?id=5795641&page=1

Le tunnel sous la Manche...

aka The Channel Tunnel, the Euro Tunnel or the "Chunnel." 31 miles from France to/from England - right under the English channel at the Strait of Dover. 246 feet at its deepest point. It opened May 6th 1994. Both passenger (via rail) and trucks on train (inter modal) as well as Ro-Ro (roll on-roll off) shuttle service moves through the adjacent 2 tunnels. There is a 3rd tunnel for service vehicles and personnel. In Europe by the way, trucks are generally referred to as "lorries." On 9/11 last week (coincidence?) a fire started in a lorry being carried by rail traveling toward France in the South Tunnel. The North tunnel moves from France to England. Inside one of the tractors was phenol - a toxic (HAZMAT) chemical. The fire raised temperatures inside the tunnel to 1800 degrees. The 32 "passengers" on board - who were the drivers of the trucks being carried on the train - were rescued and just minor injures and smoke inhalation were reported. The fire caused a major traffic backup (cars, buses and trucks) on both the French and English sides of the tunnel. Full service has not yet been restored and terrorism has been ruled out. The credit for the photo is Getty Images.

Under the radar...part #2

4 days stuck here. I'm having trouble breathing. No I'm not kidding. I read this memo on the drivers room bulletin board. I misinterpreted what it said. I couldn't catch my breath. I had to sit down. It's the intense high humidity combined with the stress I'm under. 

Recently, my body decided on its own to react to anxiety by not letting me breathe. Yes, I discussed it with my doctor. She said it was stress. And if you factor in the damn humidity, well, I just can't breathe. For those of you that go to Denver with the high altitude, you know what it feels like. I once spent a night on a mountain somewhere in Colorado and I never want to do it again. I couldn't catch my breath.

I'm back in my cubicle. I just want to stay out of the truck. Speaking of the truck, it is, according to the shop here, repaired. I am extremely leery of their pronouncement, because over the last four years, after they "repaired" it, I had to bring it back, on more than one occasion. One time, after they "repaired" it, I drove to a shipper for a load and the truck died and I had to be towed back. On a more positive note, I do have a pair of new Michelin steers and two seats that work. I can only hope that whatever else had to be done to it, was in fact, done. I don't want to come back.

I was talking about being back in my cubicle. I have all the comforts of "home" here. No wife and no life, but then that's another story. There's a desk, a chair, privacy, my cell phone, my trusty laptop and four vending machines stock full of food and drinks I don't want. Last post I told you about the Lipton Diet Citrus Tea. I threw it away after a few painful sips. Whatever else is in the machines is no better. There is a clean bathroom within a few steps with two showers and a "modern" laundry that is always in use. Around the corner are the keys to the company courtesy car with the dirty smelly ashtrays and the loose beige head liner that puffs up and down as you drive. 

Tonight several of the drivers here decided to BBQ either a huge of side beef or a really long rack 'a ribs. I got worried because when they were talking about this feast, some driver's little "frankfurter" dog was aimlessly walking around. They couldn't. No. This isn't China. They were feeding the dog Cheetos, as if they were fattening it up for his upcoming demise. Turns out, thankfully, the dog was put into the....fire?.....NO!...into the truck so he could go do whatever dogs do waiting in trucks for their owners to return.  I looked outside the window and the BBQ fire was as high as the Olympic Torch, as the rest of the natives, I mean drivers, prepared the meat, taters and beans. 

I opted not to participate in the party. I always march to my own drummer. I grabbed the courtesy car keys, drove over (with the headliner blowing up and down - how chin see) to the Flying J for dinner - alone - and returned to listen in on the festivities. Because, tonight, "there was a "special" guest. And I, your humble top-notch blogger, had the rare opportunity to sit in my little private cubicle and overhear all the exciting, stimulating, astute and worldly pontifications of not only the drivers stuck here (mostly newbies from Schneider and other "top" companies that if there wasn't a 125% turnover here - they wouldn't be allowed in the door) for the weekend, but also the "meanderings" our "special" guest. 

Now I know your just biting your lip in anticipation. Who, VGrumpy, is this person? Well, I'll keep you waiting not a moment longer. We have tonight, here in the hot rainy humid waste land of Oklahoma, our very own "whigette" lot lizard - right here in our main terminal! Her close resemblance is in the photo to your left. 

A brief bio of our special guest is in order. About 19. Bleached spiked hair. A recent resident of the Jacksonville FL correctional system. Prostitute. Bi-Sexual. Bi-Curious. Homeless. Not pennyless. About 10 lbs. too heavy, with the "excess" in all the wrong places. Chain smoker. A large tattoo (tramp stamp) above her posterior crack "Fags fa life." Hooked on War Craft. Two cell phones, one pink, the other purples, I mean purple, she said "purples." The ring tones were so loud, I literally jumped every time one or both of them would ring. And ring they sure as hell did - for hours. 

She "planted" herself in a comfy corner where she could see everyone that came in or out, just like Tony Soprano sitting in a NJ diner eating spaghetti. She said she was being followed. She didn't specify by who (whom?). I never did figure out which driver she was "associated" with. Two or three of our fine young African-American drivers were loitering around her. Perhaps she "belonged" to one of them? Everything she said was loud. She wasn't shouting, but she was, just, loud. She had a iPod or some other kind of high techno thing playing fellow whigette Pinks new song "You make me sick!" How fitting!

Based on her "conversations" this young lady had more "connections" than Donald Trump. In one "typical" cell conversation, it sounded as if she was talking to a former boyfriend and it went something lke this: "Hey dawg, mah bro, u lazy fat fuk, did ya miss me? Waz good? That's retaaard'd shit! Freak'n hilarious. Babe, I didn't mean ta shoot ya! Hey, no this shit aint turn'n me on. I need like $200. No, ya know I ain't gonna fix ya up. Hump the glass what? Yea, it wazzz goood. (laugh) That was one long ass email. Com'on. I need my nails redone, man. Ok, well, we gotta go to da booty (body?) shop. I say it was an fava,  but its an obligaaation dawg! I need it today, like right now! Did u just get paid? I be waiting. I miss ya." The Black drivers around her all nodded. I had no idea what the hell she was talking about. The white guys just kept staring at her boobs. 

And that was the simila, I mean similar "direction" of every other cell call she took. She never dialed out. Calls just kept coming in and in. And I wasa - I mean was jump'n up at every loud ring. First the pink phone then the purple and so forth and so on. Every ten minutes she would take a "smoke" break that lasted a half an hour. She smoked 'em like this was her last carton. I didn't get it - what did she care? All she had to do is ask any of the other 15 drivers, all smokers, for a cigarette, and they would all try and kill each other fulfilling her request. Two of the drivers were married. Where were the wives? Inside toiling over their laundry - of course.

The dog, I mean the meal, seemed to be a huge success. Everybody, not me, contributed some $$ to the cause and for the next two hours there was more gas passed and drivers lined up for the two stalls to deal with the feast they had just consumed, than at Shriners convention.  I begged the "extended coverage" weekend folks to please turn on the A/C. It was WW1 (chemical warfare, gas masks, etc. - get it?) in and around my cubicle. The air in the building, since the price of fuel doubled, is either off or turned way up. Nobody cares that drivers are here, watching tv, blogging, grilling little dogs and engaging in "extreme" farting. 

As I sit here, in my cubicle, the A/C is still on. The stench almost gone. The bathroom is once again free. The cleanup is over. Our "special" guest is outside somewhere. Probably in someones truck. With one of the laundry wives, perhaps? I can only dream. I kidding! She said she was bisexual right? Maybe that someone supposedly following her, found her and off she went. Who knows?

It is 8:24 PM. 7:24 central time. I've been here for most of the day. It is a lot more comfortable here than my truck seat and I'm not idling. That's got to make the company happy. Would the company President, a conservative guy who doesn't even allow his drivers to access porn if they dial up using the free company wi-fi, be pleased that we - they - had a "special" guest for dinner. Kinda of a truckers version of "Guess whose com'n to dinner?" Probably not, but what happens in Oklahoma, stays in Oklahoma. Or is that Vegas?

Now if your curious and want to hear that Pink "You make me sick" song - the album is not that bad - I actually listened to a few tunes - go here: http://myplay.com/video-player/pink/you-make-me-sick 

The credit for the photo is www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/dickanddom/galleries/2874/4

Another moron who didn't read my blog...

Every truck stop, all over the country, has the weather report on their tv's 24/7. The cb chatter is all about the weather. Ike has been talked about and tracked for two weeks. Leetle 'ole me even has posted maps and projections from the National Weather Service. And this afternoon, right on the damn front page of the ( on-line edition) of The New York Times is another "credit" to our profession. A moron who somehow did not get the message. A clueless twerp. Maybe he was the same driver who stood behind me at the FJ up here in Tulsa, who said "If Obama gets in, we'll have no more Homeland Security, oh, and by the by, screw what they're saying, I'ma headed ah Southbound tonight." Yeah it must be the same guy. I wish I had taken this photo, but it was the talented (and wet) Scott Olsen/Getty Images. This rig, by the way, is on I-10 in Houston.

Pull the string...

"Hi, I'm Governor Sara Palin." Pull the string. "Hi, I'm Governor Sara Palin." Pull the string. "Ask me a question". What if a woman is raped and gets pregnant, do you believe it is her right to have an abortion?" Pull the string. Silence. Pull the string. "Nooooo." Pull the string. "Ask me a question" Ok - do you believe in stem cell research? Pull the string. "No way, hee, hee, hee. Hi, I'm Governor Sara Palin." I didn't pull the string. Do you believe in gay rights? Pull the string. "No way, hee, hee, hee." Do you know what the Bush doctrine is? Pull the string. Nothing. Pull the string again. "No way, hee, hee, hee. Pull the string. "I mean, I sure do! Hi, I'm Governor Sara Palin."  What does it mean? Pull the string. Silence. Do you believe that because you can see Russia from Alaska, that qualifies you to be VP? Pull the string. "Yup." Sen. McCain says you're going to reform Washington, how do you intend to do that?" Pull the string. Silence. Pull the string again. "Just like I did in Alaska. I put that jet on eBay. I put that jet on eBay. I" I tap her head like in the V-8 juice commercials and Pull the string. "Hi, I'm Governor Sara Palin." Pull the string. "Obama is a baaddd man, he wants to teach kindergartner's all about the dirty deed." You mean sex? Pull the string. "Yup." Pull the string. "Obama is a baaddd man, he called me a pig!" Pull the string. "Hi, I Governor Sara Palin."  

Under the radar...kind of

I've got to talk softly. Come closer. Good. Here's the deal. I'm at the main terminal for the company I work for. This is the mecca, the big kahuna - the corporate office. Here's where all the "suits" are. The folks who have never driven a truck, but think they know everything about trucking. 

Nobody here has a sense of humor. I hate coming here. I've managed to avoid it for well over a year now. You can say I've managed to stay well under the radar. But I had to come here eventually. The shop had accumulated a long list of things to do to the truck that is impossible to do on the road at a dealer. 

I have been here almost 48 hours, kill'n time, not getting paid, waiting for the shop to take me. If I just had to deal with the shop, I guess things wouldn't be that bad. But, in order for a driver to leave the main terminal, they must "clear" safety and fuel conservation. Those are two separate deals - two different corporate wannabees, as I said, with no sense of humor. I just feel really uncomfortable here. This is a place to avoid. We have other terminals. Laredo is the best. I wish I were there.  

I drove one of the company cars to the nearby QuickStop to get a couple of sausage biscuits and a large coffee. For "health" reasons coffee and biscuits are not offered at the main terminal. You can get a fruit juice and a peanuty granola bar. That's not breakfast. It's not a meal. So I drove somewhere else close by. I'm standing on line with my sausage, egg and cheese biscuits and a 5000 calorie creamy steaming "high test" cappuccino. And lo and behold, standing next to me, is the disgustingly healthy director of safety dude. He's buying gum. Apparently he eats that with his corporate fruit juice and company approved nutty granola bar. He looks at me. Then I see his eyes move down and look at my biscuits. He says nothing. He thinks he knows me, but he's not sure. I say nothing. He pays. I pay. And we both go our separate ways. I don't think he'll report to the company's health police. 

Back at terminal, over the PA, safety is gonna hold a  "s a f e t y" meeting. The guy running it, today, is a moron. A former carpenter and pot smoker, he is now the "spokes model" for the safety department. A clown with a CDL. His "official" handle is "fuel manager." The first words out of his mouth are "I don't care if nobody likes me." Hey douche bag, here's a news flash for ya - no doubt about it, nobody likes your flat Okie ass. If this was the wild West, some stage coach driver would have shot ya between your eyes long ago. He used to be the log "Nazi" and was amazingly promoted. He is destined to work for some state DOT somewhere and be the next Monty Dial, senior trooper extraordinaire.

The next 35 minutes are a joke. Bla, bla, bla, bla. You always have 2-3 drivers who always raise their hand, always have a dumb question that extends the already too long meeting even longer. They think they're back in 1st grade. Newbies. Jesus, just shut up, let the pinhead deliver the company line and let's all get back to whatever we all were doing before the PA announcement. I almost fall asleep on my feet. I'm doing the Houdini routine - starting intently at the digital clock on the wall putting myself into a trance. I smell food. That always wakes me up. Looks unhealthy to me. How'd they get it past the guards? I hate this guy so much I won't even touch anything that he ordered. The lunchtime conversation is about some "self-sufficient" jail somewhere. Ug.

I'm back in my cubicle near the vending machines and ATM machine in "stealth" mode. My DM (driver manager) and I are at an interesting point in our relationship. We always speak of getting together and having lunch. But now that I'm here, she's not available. Right now, as I'm talking to you, she is about 35 yards away behind a series of walls and doors. She said to come "back here" and say hello. Well, it works both ways my dear. I don't really care to go into operations and be "stared" at by everyone inside. I don't care to say hello to the Operations Manager, the Director of Operations or the SVP of Operations. Whatever is going on between us, apparently some one on one face time, even for 15 minutes, does not seem possible. And I guess that's ok. I don't really have a choice anyway, do I? I should add that when I first started here more than 4 years ago, DM's were always coming out and interfacing with drivers. Today, well, I haven't seen on DM or operations person anywhere near where the drivers are. Now what does that tell you?

I just ate my second and last sausage, egg and cheese biscuit for lunch. Yummie. There's no real Pepsi in the Pepsi machine. Too unhealthy I imagine. For $1.50 it's either water or Lipton's Diet Green Tea with Citrus. I'll try to tea. Wait a minute, I'll open it up and taste it. Let's me wipe the water from my eyes. Man 'o man is it sugary. No calories, sugar or protein. Looks like urine. And its probably got enough Aspartame to sweeten a Italian wedding cake. At least its cold. But I'm going to have to suffer through each sip. 

I'm waiting for my truck to get out of the shop. I know you're just on the edge of your seat wanting to know what happens next. You'll have to wait. Sorry. I know it's rough. 

The credit for the photo of me, I mean Shaun the Sheep by Shaun_Sheep is http://www.flickr.com/photos/shaun_the_sheep/2123437262/

Latest "Ike" update from the National Weather Service...

One carrier says no more...

"Do not make any modifications to the tractor interior or exterior, including additional lights or stereo speakers, drilling holes, colored lens covers, decals, AC/DC converters. Decals of any kind or personalized plates are not allowed for the interior or exterior of the truck with the exception of a "4X6" American flag. Any unauthorized modifications will be reversed or removed at the driver's expense via payroll deduction. Many decals do not project a professional image. Offensive decals have become increasingly widespread, and many decals are poorly done - CB handles being the #1 example - and they simply don't look good. And the same can be said for multiple personalized license plates. Offensive or aggressive "CB Handles" can also cause liability issues in a cases of preventable or even non-preventable accidents."

So what's the point...

I love the feel of a real newspaper. Where I'm parked right now, they sell The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal. I can go in, get some breakfast and read my two favorite newspapers. I have to pay $3 for both, but it's worth it.  

In today's The New York Times, there was an "insert" that fell right into my lap. It was for the designer Kenneth Cole. On the cover is an attractive female in an "outfit" for the upcoming NYC winter. Large bags are in style (so they tell me) and she has a really large black one hanging off her arm. I can't imagine what it might cost. 

Page 2. Down in the left hand corner, it says, the cover photo is of Nina Poon, a "transgendered" woman. On the next page is a photo of Matisyahu. He is a devout Hasidic Jew and a "critically" acclaimed reggae recording artist. I never heard of him. Next page. Two photos of Kenosha Robinson, an African-American with albinism. 

On the back of this "advertisement" is another photo of Poon, the "transgender" woman, sitting on the lap of and about to kiss "her" boyfriend. I "googled" Poon, and it seems she is a "supermodel." I never heard of her either. 

I just don't know what to make of all this. I guess the point is to "market" diversity. Cole's world, with his weath and fame, is far different from the world that I occupy. I don't understand his world, and he certainly will never understand mine. But I really think "his deal" is a NY and LA thing having little to do with "real" people. I don't think much about transgendered folks, albinism, Jewish rappers or Kenneth Cole. 

The folks around me think about paying their bills, fuel prices, getting more miles, NASCAR and trying to get home to "momma" every once in a while. Uppermost on my mind is Wal-Mart not carrying my favorite very comfortable elastic waist $15 3XL shorts anymore. I can't get my company to give me a comfortable seat to spend 14 hours a day in.

 Kenneth Cole, as far as I'm concerned, lives on a different planet. So what's the point? If you're interested in Kenneth Cole you can go here http://www.kennethcole.com/home/index.jsp

One less DOT cop to worry about...

Senior trooper Monty Dial is retiring. So says The Trucker - "Where The News is First" What does that mean anyway? Oh well, that's a photo of Dial to the left. I imagine a "senior" trooper is one that achieves such a lofty status when he or she is not intelligent or politically savvy enough to pass the test required to be a corporal or sergeant trooper. Obviously he didn't have the right stuff (or rabbi) even with all his work on truckers radio, to be a lieutenant, captain or other high ranking super- trooper. I think I heard him a few times somewhere. I never, other than the occasional check-in with Evan Lockridge, listen to anything specifically targeted to truckers. Dial had been with the Texas Department of Public Safety for 28 years. That's a long time checking log books, weighing trucks and bust'n truckers chops. It is reported by the pinhead trucking media, that many truckers enjoyed listening to him. I cannot confirm or deny that. I do know that he was part of a bureaucracy that most truckers despise - that being the DOT. It doesn't matter if he worked in Texas or New York. His kind are almost all the same no matter where you drive your rig. And now he is retiring and turning in his citation book, his FMCSA rules and regulations and his trooper cowboy hat to someone else who is surely going to make some other truckers life miserable. I'm all for safety, but I don't like troopers, police, cops, state police, 3-day alliances, the DOT or any other group of individuals who sport a gun and a badge and play judge and jury with my livelihood. I've been a victim of their lies and nonsense and I have no respect for any of them. Senior Trooper Monty Dial - one less DOT cop to worry about. The photo credit is http://www.olblueusa.org/askthelaw/TrooperDial.html. It might be copywrited. If Dial or whoever owns it (the Texas DPS) has a problem with me using it, I'll remove and find some other career "flatfoot" to support my post. 

China, while were "screwing" around...

in the good 'ole USA, with all the nonsense we unfortunately seem to be preoccupied with, has 11 nuclear power plants in operation. A state-of-the-art (AP 1000 technology) plant is scheduled to be completed in March, 2009. China is building the world's fastest 236 mph bullet train. It will run the 808 mile trip (NY to Chicago) between Beijing and Shanghai in 4 hours. By 2010 China will increase their national rail network t0 58,906 miles. Concurrently, 15 city subway systems are being constructed. They are building 3,107 miles of new highways covering over 40,000 miles. China will spend $65 billion dollars on 97 new airports by 2020. Last month, the 101 story Shanghai World Financial Center opened. It is the tallest building in the country. Their goal, by 2025, is to erect 5 million more buildings - 50,000 skyscrapers! As reported in USA Today, "China could end up with as many as 221 cities that could each have a population above 1 million. And did you know that later this month, they will launch their 3rd manned space mission? If you think China is unskilled cheap labor, rural farms and smog, you really need to think again. We in the good 'ole USA had better get a rock'n and roll'n. 

Just in time...

Gov. Sara Palin got home today after a being on the campaign trail with Sen. McCain. Just in time, because her "executive" experience was desperately needed to "supervise" the following - as reported in the Sept. 11th 2008 USA Today - "Chugach State Park officials closed a trail following a bear encounter in an Anchorage neighborhood. A grizzly charged as a volunteer opened a gate to the parking area for the Canyon Road Trail. The bear, which was guarding a moose carcass, then made off. Officials said the trail may remain closed for several days."

One heck of a error....

How many shares of Sirius/XM do you own? Did you lose some value? Your portfolio take a hit? From the Corrections & Amplifications section page A2 of The Wall St. Journal, Thursday, September 11th 2008: "Sirius/XM Radio Inc. expects to report in 2009 a profit of $300 million before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortization. A Corporate News article incorrectly said the company was expecting a loss of $300 million. 

This is so boring, but stop asking...

me about your damn axle weight. I don't want to see any more of your scale tickets. Enough already. What trucking school did you go to? You actually want me to believe your carrier never told you about your trailer? I drive a spread axle. I frankly don't know why every trailer does not have spread axles. I rarely worry about being overweight. The suspension load meter on my dash tells me quite accurately- thank you - how much my load weighs. There is nothing as hilarious as a driver stopped in the middle of some truck stop with 3 scale tickets falling out of his jeans - trying to slide his axles. Bang, bang, bang - get back in the truck - try to slide forward or back - outside again - bang, bang, bang - how absurd. Today, I had just parked in the FJ to grab some dinner. No sooner do I put my feet on the ground and a driver comes running up to me with his scale ticket - "Sir, sir, sir, how do I, what can I, help, help, help." "Sorry brother, I drive a spread axle!" Hey, I was really hungry! There were other drivers around, why ask me? Anyway, there are a lot of other folks who can explain this better. For the confused and needy, you can go to that idiotic "site" - TruckerNet, DriversRoundTable, or something like that. I'm sure Dave Sweetman will come to your rescue. Until then, I think this is how it works. First of all, make sure you have a sledge hammer and a can of liquid wrench. If you are a female driver, you probably already know (because female drivers are a lot smarter than men drivers) how to adjust your truck weight, but on the outside chance you don't, just stand there helpless (a little extra lip gloss helps) and you'll have every male trucker stop and do it all for you. For the clueless others, try to get someone else, preferably not me, to assist you with what you're doing. Each "pin" hole represents, let's say +/-, 350 lbs. With the trailer brakes applied - that's the big red button - if you push the trailer back you're transferring more weight to the trailer axles and less weight on the drives. If you pull the trailer forward, there will be less weight on the trailer axles and more weight on the drives. That's the best I can explain it. As far as sliding your fifth wheel - and for the record - I don't even have to do that - mine are fixed to where experience has proven that where they are is the best place to distribute the weight - slide the fifth wheel all the way back and they'll be less weight on your steers and more weight on the drives. Slide them all the way forward - that is toward your cab - there will be more weight on your steers and less weight on the drives. I have a headache. Buy a spread axle. And leave me alone!  The photo is a Great Dane trailer from http://www.greatdanetrailers.com/

Remember the innocent folks...

I was on home time when 9/11 occurred. I will never forget the innocent folks jumping out of the exploding windows of the trade center, falling to their deaths. They left their homes that morning to go to work never imagining what was about to happen to them. I can't go the NYC without being really upset at not seeing those twin towers. I used to work two blocks south of the WTC, at 42 Trinity Place. I attended classes at the World Trade Institute at night in the WTC. I remember sitting there feeling the building sway in the high freezing winds of winter. Everyday, for about four years, I would take the Path train from Jersey City or Hoboken to work. I ate at Windows on the World at the top of the WTC many times. One of my father's best friends, Stan, used to keep a collection of wine at Windows. We would share a bottle when we ate lunch there. Mrs. Grumpy worked right across the river and had a clear view of the towers from her office. We had long since moved away to Florida when terrorists attacked the buildings with civilian airliners. As the aircraft in the photo approaches one of the towers, I can't imagine the terror the innocent passengers on board were experiencing. How so unfair to use them as weapons. They did not deserve to die. And, let's not ever forget the brave victims that were murdered at the Pentagon (both on the ground and in the plane) as well as in the countryside of PA. And all the NYC fire fighters and cops. The person responsible for this, Osama Bin Laden, has somehow managed to avoid capture by the most powerful nation in the world. We have the armies, the planes, the technology and the know how to get him, but it still has not happened. I feel the souls of all who lost their lives on 9/ll still crying, not yet at peace, until everyone responsible for what happened that day is caught and justice is carried out. I have never been back to the WTC site or the place I used to work. There was a Blimpie one block from the WTC I used to stop in every morning for coffee and a bagel. I don't think my old office or the Blimpie is still there. I think they were incinerated that day the towers fell. And, a new WTC has not been built to demonstrate our resolve against terrorism. I remain very sad. 

Outgunned, outmaneuvered...

Yes, all this "lipstick on a pig" stuff is all complete nonsense. Schoolyard childishness. Nam bee-pambee useless verbiage. Sen. Obama and Sen. McCain have both used the "expression." Nobody cared when McCain said it, now it seems just about everyone has heard about Obama using it. I would say to Sen. Obama that using it now, with the Gov. Palin "lipstick on a pit bull" remark still very much a hot button, was just not a good idea, no matter what he meant. Obama looked tired and seems like he's getting frustated. And the Republicans are lov'n it. It's all part of the strategy. And Obama is fall'n right in the hole. If this campaign was a football game, it was the Democrats who have controlled the ball, but when the Republicans came out of their halftime - their national convention - they came out like a Japanese bullet train. And the Democrats have lost very valuable ground. They are being outgunned and outmaneuvered. With the election about 50 days away, it is not time to be using your second string players. We have seen Republicans get first down after first down. Selecting Palin was a touchdown. Sen. Obama and his "team" need to get it "back" together and fast. They need to get back the field position they've lost. They fumbled by not selecting Hillary as their VP nominee. If the Democrats don't want to lose the game, they got to find the "mojo" they had when Obama was a rock star. If the Dems lose the election after 8 years of Bush, then one has to wonder if they deserved the office in the first place. The credit for the photo is http://www.flickr.com/photos/aschmitt/153205349/ 

Warning: think carefully...

Are you a salesperson, trucker or someone that spends a lot of time on the road? Well, then you get a lot of information from your radio whether it be satellite or terrestrial. You might have time to scan a newspaper or two over a quick dinner. Maybe you get the opportunity to talk to your customers or the "guys" on the dock. Truckers certainly b.s. around the truck stop counter. And all this is good. Perhaps you listen to Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, Shawn Hannity, Glenn Beck, Bubba and others. But friends, beware. This is all entertaining. But you must be aware that all of what you are listening to is, shall we say, slanted. Sure, you might think Fox News is "fair and balanced", but it is definitely not. And I don't care. That's their shtick, and if you like it, fine. But we're "coming off" of eight long years of a Republican administration, that, well, screwed the pooch. To be fair, Congress, specifically the Democratic leadership in the House and Senate did a really lousy job too. Bush, Palosi and Reed make quite a trio. But, friends, I need you to step back a moment, turn off the radio, put down the newspaper and think for yourself. Yeah, yeah, she's a woman, he's a war hero and he's Black. But try to blow all the smoke and mirrors away. Forget the latest "gaff." Candidates are people too. They get tired, angry and are under a constant microscope. Cut come they slack. Really think about who is going to make your life better? Most of the folks you listen to on the radio and tv are millionaires. Of course, they don't want to pay more taxes, if they even pay any taxes. Many corporations here in the US don't. What about health insurance? If you lose your job tomorrow, will you have health insurance? And I'm not talking about that absurd Cobra plan that most Americans cannot afford. Please think people. We have a $407 billion dollar deficit. Our government has $53 trillion dollars of "unfunded liabilities." Sending our manufacturing jobs to China, the Pacific Rim, India, and Mexico has resulted in the worst most unbalanced trade deficit in history. Our real estate values have plummeted and now our government is in the mortgage business with "their" takeover of Freddie Mack and Fannie Mae. And with less than 60 days to the election, our outgoing President announces a troop withdrawal from Iraq while sending more troops into Afghanistan. Bin Laden still remains at large. Friends, I don't think this is a Democrat or Republican "thing." What does your "gut" say to you. Do you remember Ron Paul? How are we going to get out of this mess? Are you undecided? Overwhelmed perhaps? I warn you, think carefully, please. Turn off the "noise" and spend some time with yourself and vote for the best candidate. Use the internet and do some of your own research. This election deserves more than you just listening to the radio. Remember that they're a lot of smart (wicked) folks out there who know who to pull the wool over your eyes and convince you that their way is the "right"way. Watch out. Again, think for yourself, please! The credit for the photo of Karl Rove http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_Rove 

Welcome to my world...

I left San Antonio about 1pm yesterday to pick up a load in Rockdale TX. I get there about 4:30pm. I have a 1900 or 7pm load time appointment. The material is due in Evansville IN Wednesday morning at 8am. After getting on the scale for my MT weight, then checking in with security, I took a 15 minute "power-nap", did some "house cleaning" and had a light dinner. 

There are about 25 trucks waiting to load, some of which arrived hours before their appointment time. Many asked if they could get in earlier, and "no" was the response. This is a "mega" sized manufacturing complex, but for flatbeds, there is only 1 loading door, and they only load 1 truck at a time. Forget asking why, you just have to accept it.

7:35pm. Security calls me on the CB to come to the front gate and sign in. Got a map and directions where to go and followed two other trucks who were n  front of me. Even with a map we almost take a wrong turn toward a "restricted" area. Since we don't want to risk the chance of being thrown off the property, we all stop - I check the map, redirect the convoy and we get to the appropriate location. The lead truck is flagged inside the loading area. Four pieces are placed on his deck and then comes 4 of the most dreaded words in flatbed trucking - "THE CRANE IS BROKEN!" 

8pm. 9pm. I send in my two-hour detention warning. 10pm, 11pm - midnight. I'm now listening to the repeat of the Bill O'Reilly show I heard earlier at 8. 1am. I can't keep my eyes open. I hate falling asleep and then have someone bang on my door. The crane could be repaired in a few minutes, in a hour or later in the day. Right after the bang, and the shock of figuring out where I am - I would have to jump in the drivers seat and back this 80 ft sucker into a tight dock door to load 24 tons of material. 

As an aside - what part of this does the DOT and FMCSA not understand? Everything. Maybe the FMCSA wants me to take a little jog while I'm waiting. Where I am, if I "stray" from the truck off the property into the "prairie", I might never be seen again. 

For dinner, I ate a microwaved can of soup, Ritz crackers and chocolate milk. Darn, I asked security when the "roach coach" with the apples, bananas, egg whites and whole grain bread is coming, but then this is TEXAS, not downtown San Francisco. Can you say "barreeeeto" with hot sauce and Hawaiian Punch? 

I lay down in the bunk. Engine off. Nice cool night. "The stars at night, are big and bright, deep in the heart of...."  I'm having trouble settling down. My brain is going 100 miles an hour. Why didn't I do my nightly 2 mile run. LOL. I open my eyes. I sit up. The first truck that had to get out of the dock so they could fix the crane is back in. The truck in front of me has moved up. It is 4:45am. The crane is working again. I'm having trouble focusing. I spray some cold water in my eyes. A little better. No time to make coffee. 

5:45. I'm loaded. Now I have to find my way back to the main gate. It is pitch black. There are no signs. A billion dollar multinational corporation and not one freak'n sign to direct me to the exit. I go slow - real slow - brights on. I remember a left turn here and go through what looks like the inside of an aircraft carrier. Yea, I've been on a few. Ahhh, LAND HO!, the security building is dead ahead. Only one truck in and out at a time. Channel 19. Ok to proceed. 

Now across the street to the incredibly tight not well lit scale to reweigh. 71.5K  lbs. Not bad. Thought I was heavier. Channel 19 to call in the weight. Park the truck. Walk back across the street, back to the security building to get the paperwork. At least I didn't have to wear all that safety (PPG) gear. Just drive in, stay in the truck, load and leave. 

The sun is coming up. Speak to Mrs. Grumpy on her way to work. I'm really tired. Qualcom in the detention data, send in a loaded call and tell my DM that after strapping and tarping, I IS GOING TO BED. That's after I do my jumping jacks, walk around the truck 100 times and drink my V-8. NOT.

I have defied my biorhythm. I have been up most of the night. Did I say that I'm really tired?I'll get about an hour of sleep - an "extended" nap and might be good to go. It's all bullshit. It's not safe. It's not healthily. But I'm a OTR truck driver. Welcome to my world!

PS/Are you the least but curious how I logged all this? I tell you later, maybe.

PS2/After my 2nd "nap", I left Rockdale TX and drove 471.7 miles and repowered this load in Tulsa OK. It is not 9:58pm. Last night at the same time, I was waiting for the crane to be fized. I've had about 4-5 hours sleep in the last 24 hours.