Yes, you read that right. Evan Lockridge, trucking broadcaster extraordinaire, can be heard on Sirius 147, Road Dog Trucking from 2-4pm daily. I try so hard not to listen, but he's additive in a SNL - Saturday Night Live kinda way. The callers are mostly redneck morons who use their CB "handles" and his guests, are, how can I put it, clueless and boring. The show is part informational, part infomercial and part stand-up.
Lockridge himself, a "4-wheeler" is entertaining, but still doesn't know much about "real-world" trucking. You're wrong Evan - you can type on a Qualcom, even while you're driving. A hour of an Allied Van Lines driver survey? Or was that another informercial. Like anyone cares.
Callers into the show are always saying "Oh thank you, Evan", "You're the best", "If it wasn't for you, Evan!." It's sooo damn corny. I always wondered what the deal was. After briefly checking on the "show" the last few days, I figured it out. Lockridge wants all his male listeners - mostly horny truckers who have not have "real" in a long long time - to have a larger penis.
Apparently, all those callers have listened to him, now have larger and longer - I mean "bigger"- penises, and are calling in to thank him. How do I know? Well, Prolixus is a regular advertiser on his show. Prolixus? The MALE ENHANCEMENT FOLKS! "A tissue stimulating formula! Stretch those "walls" with your (new) thick and wide penis." That's what they say on their web site. "Be thick, be wide - always satisfied." The sexy woman voice (Kelly Lynn Daniels) says (I'm paraphrasing) - "Does size matter? Not the length, it's the width - the thickness. All the ladies out there are now smiling just thinking about it!" Oh yeah, baby!!
Heck, if you listen to Lockridge's show, you can order this "magic" and "creepy" stuff and get a FREE MEASURING DEVICE" to "monitor" your success. I kid you not. And you can even use this "device" to make "better"(thicker and wider?) entries in your log book! What a deal? A bigger - thicker penis and a great looking log book! No wonder Lockridge's callers are thanking him so much!
Lockridge recently has been a lot happier and in great spirits. He's even laughing more and making fun of his many stupid mistakes. He has even started calling female truck drivers - sweeetie. Can you say Prolixus? Thanks, Evan, but I like my penis just the way it is. And $76.99 for a bottle of 60 "magic" pills is way too rich for my blood.
1. The credit for the photo is: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michelangelo's_David
2. Lockridge really wants you to be happy, larger and thicker so you too can call into his show and thank him, so please go to: http://www.prolixus.net/
** Hey, Evan, don't you think David up there could be thicker and wider? Does Prolixus come in a creme? LOL
